mom meets mom: expectations


Lifestyle blogger Esther (UrbanMoms) and myself are having a conversation every two weeks about our real lives behind our online (blog) world.

A lot of things have changed this year for us in our (family) schedule with our oldest boy going to school at the age of 4. First adapting to this new phase not only for us but most of all for him. Long days and so many new things to discover, see and experience. But after a few months he is doing better and better and enjoying more and more. It is so nice to see he likes all of it and to hear him talking about things he did and learned or just singing a new song he learned. All those little things can really make you so proud and make you smile when seeing and hearing it. Little boys are getting big…and it makes me realize to enjoy every moment of it because they are growing so fast. 

When going to school as a parent you also meet new parents with kids from the same age. There are differences and things you can relate too and it's nice to hear and see that sometimes you are really not the only one in this world dealing with changing behaviour and how kids develop, react and be… 

I noticed for example that some kids are already taking part actively in outside school activities like sports at the age of 4. This made me think "am I doing something wrong?" because our boy is not taking part in a certain kind of sports right now like football or judo or something else. He has not brought it to our attention yet and he now really likes to play outside with the kids in the neighborhood playing games, riding his bike or just going to a playground. It has slipped my mind once and a while to go to a kind of toddler gym when he was younger but when pregnant of our second boy it didn't quite happen due to health reasons and other things.  

So now I was wondering what to do? We have to arrange his first swimming lessons and are looking in to that and with him going to school and so many things that change wouldn't it be better to first let him do things time by time? So first school with all those new experiences and then swimming lessons (that can be very intensive as I have heard) and after that letting him decide which sports he would like to try.  For me it does not feel right to give a little kid of 4 already a kind of busy agenda with things he has to do without feeling free to do what he wants like just playing and dealing with all these changes already. 

It almost feels like I have to put my child on sports and let's not forget he needs to get on music lessons too (because that is really something you have to do) according to others… And not only this is a very busy week for a child already but what to mention about our schedule? Planning this all outside school times, working and having another child of one years old who has his sleeping times etc.  

Just curious what you think of this? Am I holding this from him or is it ok to let him do things one by one because he has his whole life and coming years to develop what he wants and likes? 

Read the detailed response by Esther here on her blog. 

XO Jantine


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